I am so pleased that my mother trained her sons to show honor to others. We were raised to ask permission to be excused from the dinner table to sit in the living room until the adults were finished eating. When the adults entered the living room, children were expected to stand and offer their seats so adults could choose to sit anywhere they chose. As well, we were coached to greet and offer firm handshakes to adults as a means of showing respect. Though not raised in a Christian home, I look back on those days from my many years in the gospel ministry and see the influence of God's Word on the culture of that day and in my own family.
Honor is profoundly important in God's scheme of things. God Himself has directed His creatures to honor Him in many passages, as well as with our substance and with the firstfruits of our increase, Proverbs 3.9. Thus, honoring God is far more than displaying an attitude of reverence, though it should not be thought God can be honored without reverence. It costs to honor God. In like manner, when widows and spiritual leaders are honored more is called for than a simple display of respect, 1 Timothy 5. 2 and 17.
Certainly, the most important directive for honoring other people is the command found in Exodus 20.12, "Honour thy father and thy mother," the first commandment with promise. Of all those people God directs one to honor the prominence of place goes to the honoring of father and mother. With the first four of the Ten Commandments related to one's relationship with God, the final six are related to one's relationship with other people, and the first on the second tablet calling for the honoring of parents. Interestingly, the command to honor father and mother occupies more prominence of place than the command protecting one's relationship with his spouse. This is not to say that wives should not be honored (1 Peter 3.7), but that God directed men to honor their parents before He directed men to honor their wives.
It is obvious that God's will is for us to honor Him, and for us to honor qualified widows and ministers. It is also clear that God wants us to honor our parents and our spouses. In fact, believers are to honor all men (1 Peter 2.17). It is not difficult to understand the importance of us honoring God and our fellow man, since each of us yearns to be honored.
This understood, what are we to think when attempts are made to prevent us from honoring those we should honor? Specifically, what are we to think when attempts are made to prevent us from honoring God, or our parents, or our spouses? When wisdom and discrimination is exercised there is no conflict when honor is properly rendered. Thus, despite the protests of those who would hinder our expressions of honor to God, to parents, to spouses, and to others, it does not detract from one's honor of his wife to properly honor his father. When someone protests or seeks to interfere with your attempt to honor your father or mother you should be alarmed. The same is true whenever you are discouraged from honoring your spouse.
Honoring is like love in this respect. No matter how much you love someone; there is no diminishing of love for others. To honor your father does not diminish in any way your ability to honor your wife. In fact, the counter argument can be made. As you love one you become more loving and able to love others more fully. In like manner, by honoring one you become more capable of honoring others. Honor is not a commodity that one depletes with use, but a grace that becomes more abundant with use.
Honor God. Honor your father. Honor your mother. Honor your spouse. Honor those to whom honor is due. Honor all men. Honor your pastor. Recognize the great wickedness of anyone's attempt to discourage your efforts to honor anyone.
